Movie Mettle is a weekly column for moviegoers with weak constitutions. Wish you had the balls to sit through the goriest of horror movies? Want to build up your resistance to weepy rom-coms? Each week we’ll give you a range of five movies that will test your limits, you cinematic thrillseeker, you.
Being a film critic, I’m lucky enough to see most of the new movies that come out each year. But believe it or not, it’s difficult for me to track down friends or even acquaintances to be my plus-one to press screenings. For instance, I ran through at least four friends trying to find a buddy to accompany me to The Cabin in the Woods in the summer of 2012, but I got the same response from all my buddies: “Oh, I don’t like horror movies. Or gory ones.” Never mind that Cabin skewered both conventions of the horror genre — they weren’t having it.
As someone who reveres moviemaking as an art, I can’t let such prejudices exist. That’s why I created this column — and that’s why I couldn’t resist making gore the focus of my first installment. Moreso than simple jumps or creepy catchphrases, gore seems to be what most turns people off from certain types of horror films.
Here’s a range of films: The first will make your eyes go wide, whereas the last will probably have you dry-heaving. Are you ready?
Warm-Up: Valentine
[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KEwV-VN8YVY&version=3&hl=en_US]I’m starting out easy on you guys. The vengeful nerd who dons a Cupid’s mask and kills the girls who snubbed him in middle school is pretty standard in how he picks off his victims. There are a lot of sharp objects (knife, axe) that produce a fair amount of blood. Plus, since this is a Valentine’s Day-themed thriller, the usual tropes of the holiday get a gruesome twist. But you could easily watch it on your own — lights on or off, your choice — and maybe even laugh at some of the death scenes.
Novice: Final Destination 2
[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EEUYk2xU4R0&version=3&hl=en_US]What makes the second Final Destination palatable enough is how cartoonish the violence is. It’s the usual plot: Girl has a premonition about a grisly car accident, saves her friends — and then Death comes after them to claim their lives. This movie is intense from the get-go, where we get to see just exactly how bad the fifteen-car pile-up would have been. Then, as the kids try to escape their fates, we witness Death use everyday objects like fire escape ladders and oxygen tanks against them.
I’ve always described the Final Destination films as “fun” because once you commit to the premise, you get to see how creative the writers get with the death scenes. So they don’t really rattle me. Then again, ever since I watched it a decade ago, I can’t go into an elevator without remembering the girl who gets her hair stuck in the doors… So, there is that.
Intermediate: Saw 3-D
[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WXgdG7zl31k&hl=en_US&version=3]Although the seventh and final film in the Saw series lacks some of the creativity of the former entries, it’s no less gory. Consider the opening sequence, which has two guys impaling the girl who had been dating both of them onto a buzz saw. And those aren’t even the characters that Jigsaw really wants revenge on! Not only is there blood, but there’s limbs and guts and flashbacks to the original Saw‘s infamous amputation scene. They don’t hold back.
Expert: The Human Centipede II (Full Sequence)
[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=okZZca4EfAQ&hl=en_US&version=3]Here’s how I sum up my experience with the second Human Centipede film in one sentence: “My throat was sore because I was dry-heaving so hard.” Take the worst part of The Human Centipede (First Sequence), when the deranged German doctor made his new pet eat its own feces. Then turn that two-minute scene into a veritable mini-climax in the second scene, and you’ll be cursing filmmaker Tom Six the way my fellow risky moviegoers and I did at our midnight screening in 2011.
This is the kind of film where you may want to know exactly what to expect ahead of time, so you can brace yourself. There’s no shame in that. Let me direct you to a piece I wrote when I first saw the film, which lays out the grossest and most horrifying moments. But know that if I’m giving you fair warning, I expect you to rent the film!
BAMF: Martyrs
[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lNpDiQimK6U&version=3&hl=en_US]OH MY GOD THIS MOVIE. My horror buddy (with whom I saw Human Centipede II) made me sit through this one, and we were basically clinging to each other the whole time. This French horror film possesses a bit more nuance than the previous entry, so I don’t want to ruin the whole thing for you. In short, a young woman is kidnapped by a secret society who tortures its prisoners to force them into an out-of-body experience.
So while you’re challenging your own limits of tolerance for gore, you’re also watching a young woman be thrust to the precipice of pain. There’s plenty of blood, sure, but the most violent act is actually characterized by its lack of blood (that’s sort of a hint). Watch this with another person, keep the lights on and try to make it through the end without closing your eyes.
Now, these recommendations are based on movies I’ve actually seen — so if I missed some hideously gory flicks, share your favorites in the comments!
11 thoughts on “Movie Mettle: 5 Gory Horror Films To Test Your Limits”
I totally agree with you on Martyrs one of the greatest schocker I’ve seen. In the weirder category, you could add the highly disturbing Suicide Club.
Really glad Martyrs is on there. That movie broke me. I refuse to see Human Centipede II. The first movie wasn’t even gross to begin with (Barely showed anything), but I had no doubt in my mind that this sequel, based on what other people have said, would be too much.
I actually REALLY like Human Centipede II, although yes, it is unpleasantly graphic. But in terms of production value, story and thematic weight (yes, I said it), it’s a far superior film to the first one
Yes! So glad to find someone else who appreciates the Human Centipede movies. I’ve actually had a semi-academic essay about the first one stewing in me for years, just haven’t found the right place to pitch it.
However, not sure I could agree that Human Centipede II carries more weight than the first one. I know they were trying to be all meta and make a larger commentary, but a lot of that movie felt excessive. Entertaining as shit, but excessive. That said, convince me otherwise! I want to hear why you enjoyed it more.
Publish it here! Maybe I can even respond to it with an essay of my own singing the praises of Part 2
Yeah, the meta element is pretty excessive, but then again I don’t really expect subtlety from this franchise. But I have a big softspot for horror films that subvert their audience’s enjoyment.
SPOILERS FOR HUMAN CENTIPEDE 2
Look at the juxtaposition between the baby’s birth scene and the barb wire rape scene. The first is completely slapstick and absurd, and although it’s gruesome (a baby’s head is crushed), it’s also pretty hilarious. Then, BAM, an absolutely brutal rape scene. Saw this with a crowd, and they went from laughing hysterically to shocked silence. All of a sudden, the violence isn’t so funny. I dig that kind of thing.
You know, I actually haven’t seen the version with the rape scene. (Silly America.) I -knew- it existed, but because they cut it I lost that juxtaposition. I will, however, agree that the baby scene is weirdly funny. I definitely remember laughing–I’m a horrible person–mostly at how ridiculous/wtf it was.
Human Centipede II is way, way too much and all in the service of stroking Tom Six’s ego. The guy’s just trying to push the envelope. That’s actually a fine endeavor, but he’s a slacker, and he does it in the laziest, most uninventive ways possible. So, basically, screw that movie.
Martyrs is a great choice. The rest of the films here are pretty soft, honestly– the gore of Saw is undermined by its stupidity and the distance that puts between us and the story– but if you want to test yourself, Martyrs is an excellent place to start. It’s brutal. It’s unrelenting. And it’s made with honest intention, which is a whole lot scarier than any exercise in throwing buckets of blood on a wall.
A couple recommendations of my own: Inside and The Woman. The latter in particular. Or maybe the former. I dunno, they’re both really frigging gruesome, so take your pick.
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REVENGE movies these are NOT. Check out TRUE revenge like “7 days” and “The Tortured”
Odd, was expecting A Serbian Film or Salo, but Martyrs do the job too.